Claude the hypnotist
It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' center.
After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano,
it was time for the star of the show- Claude the Hypnotist!
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience
into a trance. "Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time." said Claude.The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from his waistcoat pocket; a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see."It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations" said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting:
"Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch"
The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth. The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces.A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch.They were hypnotized.
And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!!
The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact"
"SHIT" said Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens ' Center and Claude was never invited there again.
slimming clubs
Hiya does any one know of slimming clubs in la marina.
Thanks
A few ladies from La Marina go to Benijofar at 2pm on Tuesdays. There's a meeting in a dance studio in the square on the right, by the cobbles.
Geoff.
Hi,
There was recently a slimming club in the Final Whistle in Consum Square. I believe it was held every Tuesday at 2pm.
The diet is similar to the old Slimming World one, ie Red and Green days, if you are familiar with that.
Concrete Breaker/hammer Drill
anyone know where I can hire one of these for a day to allow me to break thro' my concrerte front patio in Urb La Marina , to plant a couple of lemon/orange trees.
thanks ,
Rob Hughes
IS THE SUN STILL SHINING FOR EX PATS LIVING IN SPAIN
FIGURES RELEASED yesterday by the Spanish National Institute of Statistics reveal 9,344 people of UK nationality registered as living in the province, returned home last year.
The figures are the highest within the Valencia region and run for the full year ending December 31 2016.
The amount of British expatriates living in Alicante Province has shown a steady decline year on year ever since the financial crisis, which crippled the country in 2009.
However, last year saw the greatest exodus back to the UK, putting the amount of Britons living in the province back to the levels of 2004.
The statistics show at January 1 this year 63,010 UK nationals were registered as residing in Alicante province.
This still leaves British expatriates as the largest group of non-Spanish residents in the province, with a total of 16% of all foreign residents.
The report shows that the lack of purchasing power felt by UK nationals since the economic crisis has seen the Alicante population fall by over half since 2008, but the numbers accelerated last year following the Brexit referendum and the decision to leave the European Union.
Although the UK tops the list of people leaving, other nationalities also left the province to return home in significant numbers. German nationals were reduced by 3,054 and French by 354.
The figures show an increase in people moving into the Province from Algeria (144), Morocco (1,131) and Columbia (1,049), wheareas Argentina, Ecuador and Russia all saw decreases in population.
By contrast, the Chinese population continues to increase year on year since 1998, when the statistics were first introduced. There are currently 8,349 Chinese living in the province, an increase of 80% on last year.
I imagine these figures reflect the result from leaving the EU!
We are a retired couple leaving in La Marina area and we are very worried about the future living in Spain.
So many conflicting stories of which many are FAKE NEWS!.
Seriously, does anyone really know what the future will bring??
FOR SALE Dacia Stepway TCE 0.9
Part of the Sandero range, manufactured by Renault. Registered in August 2015 the car still has over a year guarantee from the Renault garage.
Only 15.000 km on the clock, fully serviced with plug in parking camera, Bluetooth, hands free, usb stereo and full Sat Nav system. It has an eco-button so is very economical to run, stop / start system and a low SUMA tax rating so road tax is just 15€ a year.
Just valeted to get back that “new” feeling and name change included in the price.
For more details and viewing contact me on (0034) 633205978, email at misstinabrownukmail.com or go into the Expat Solutions office in Consum Square, La Marina Urbanisation.
9,950€
Found. One Cat ????
I am now in possession of One cat who seems to have found us.!!! He's white with light brown markings a white tail with ringed light brown .He has beautiful pale blue eyes.He's made himself right at home.Hes under nourished and needs a good wash but very friendly.Fed him,watered him but can't keep him.Can anyone help?
We will put the word out and hope that we can find his home. Good for you for taking him in and we will do our best.
New law implemented to allow investors to claim their money back from banks.
Have you lost money on any investment in Spain and never thought you would ever see your money again?
Would you like a registered UK claims company to investigate on your behalf with NO UP FRONT FEE and your claim is based on a NO WIN NO FEE basis?
Very high success rate and fully recommended by ASL.
Contact: [email protected] for further details.
THOUSANDS OF EX PATS RETURNING HOME
FIGURES RELEASED yesterday by the Spanish National Institute of Statistics reveal 9,344 people of UK nationality registered as living in the province, returned home last year.
The figures are the highest within the Valencia region and run for the full year ending December 31 2016.
The amount of British expatriates living in Alicante Province has shown a steady decline year on year ever since the financial crisis, which crippled the country in 2009.
However, last year saw the greatest exodus back to the UK, putting the amount of Britons living in the province back to the levels of 2004.
The statistics show at January 1 this year 63,010 UK nationals were registered as residing in Alicante province.
This still leaves British expatriates as the largest group of non-Spanish residents in the province, with a total of 16% of all foreign residents.
The report shows that the lack of purchasing power felt by UK nationals since the economic crisis has seen the Alicante population fall by over half since 2008, but the numbers accelerated last year following the Brexit referendum and the decision to leave the European Union.
Although the UK tops the list of people leaving, other nationalities also left the province to return home in significant numbers. German nationals were reduced by 3,054 and French by 354.
The figures show an increase in people moving into the Province from Algeria (144), Morocco (1,131) and Columbia (1,049), wheareas Argentina, Ecuador and Russia all saw decreases in population.
By contrast, the Chinese population continues to increase year on year since 1998, when the statistics were first introduced. There are currently 8,349 Chinese living in the province, an increase of 80 on last year.
Watch out, plods about!!
€750 for mobile chat at wheel under new Spanish driving laws.DRIVERS face fines of up to €750 for using a mobile phone while at the wheel from tomorrow (Saturday).
The fines are to be introduced following a controversial change to law that will allow all EU authorities to even trace overseas drivers for fines.
The new laws outlined cover eight offences including speeding, failing to stop at a red light, failing to wear a seatbelt and using a phone while driving.
Until now, foreign motorists could be fined in Spain only if they were stopped by police at the roadside or were in a hire car (where the company holds drivers’ personal details).
Under the new laws, from tomorrow Spain and all other EU nations will be able to obtain drivers’ details.
The Department for Transport in the UK has said it will seek to revoke the rules following Brexit in two years.
At least the UK has seen sense by saying that this stupid rule will be revoked.
But saying that, when someone has lost a relative or close friend due to someone being totally wrecked behind the wheel, then a €750 fine
is an insult!
Relocating to Spain
Hi, my wife and I are thinking of making a move to LA Marina. We are a little concerned about such issues like healthcare. Do the Spanish NHS honour our. E111 cards now that we are set to leave europe? We have heard some stories from people that the Spanish authorities have been taking these cards from ex-pats without any explanation.
Does anyone have an opinion whether this is a good or bad time for Brits moving to Spain?
Where would be the best place? We have heard that LA Marina Urb is basically a massive housing estate. We do not want Blackpool with sunshine, any suggestions?
It is most definitely not Blackpool in the sun. I only visit there and have never seen a kiss-me-quick hat yet. It is a place to chill. Outside of the "season" you hear more yapping dogs than people at night. As for the Brexit thing, it is too early to tell. If you want lively give it a miss, but to chill take the leap
Thanks for the comments Silverfox, it's just that we have heard some 'horror stories' about life in the sun. Wasn't sure if Brexit had kicked in as yet, anyway it may make no difference at all. We are due to come over soon so will get first hand experience. On another subject does anyone know when the Processionary Caterpillar season finishes as we are worried about our dogs?
The old yapping dog syndrome rises its head again.!! That will never change,the dogs are far more important than peoples relaxation and sleep.All the people that complain can't all be wrong?
i havent got a (yappy) dog as you call them,but i would say someone with a dog who makes itself known is less likely to get burgled etc.
Sorry,not sure who you are,I was actually addressing the comments from Silverfox1955.He has a very valid and fast increasing point,not really sure what continually yapping dogs throughout the night has to do with burglary. Not heard of any burglaries on the URB of late,I could be wrong though!!
I have my own pet hypnotist he is called Peter Warke & he has fixed my weight & my depression